rough time

[Sans911]

What's your day been like?@outlander

[outlander]

mmm ... its been very tough @Sans911 i wanted to end it today including thoughts on how

[Sans911]

Awww lil Sis @outlander. Did something happen to make you feel this way? Or is it just everything? And how are you feeling now? Are you safe?

Come sit with your Big Sis and I'll give you a hug. What a terrible place to be in.

[outlander]

im sorry. i wrote a whole post but i cant click post. i dont want to be a burden @Sans911

[Sans911]

You're not a burden to me hun, never. I feel privileged that you share this heavy struggle with me. You are often there for me, and I want to be there for you.

@outlander 💜 💜

[Sans911]

Can you cut and paste your post into a new one?

[outlander]

I spoke to the co-ordinators of my third job-the one i find more rewarding with the kids and apparently they arent calling me back anymore. theyve replaced me.


then some things within the family which was my rant abit earlier which have stirred up the past few days events with them and some of the things that have been said.

and today was also the day i tried to save my nan and help a distressed pop while calling ambulances, and mum for help and tomorrow is when she passed 3 yrs ago. so i have lots of things happening emotionally and mentally in that department.


had more dreams again the past few nights which is still keeping the other dog flashbacks around and irrational worries over basically everything and anything.

@Sans911 

[outlander]

i feel i cant connect anywhere or to anyone. no matter where i turn, i dont feel 'right'
im struggling to even connect here and that makes me upset because i have some beautiful caring people hereeven if i dont deserve them 😞

[Sans911]

I started a long post and then I lost it @outlander

Did they give any reason for replacing you with your job? That's pretty harsh, and sounds like you'll miss it.

Lots of things going on for you at the moment to overwhelm you huh?

Medical emergencies are always tricky. So many emotions involved. So many what ifs, what comes first, taking care of others needs. And you were quite young. That's really hard core stuff to deal with little one.

You have lots of responsibilities for a young person, and your life isn't easy at all. I don't know how to make it better, but if I could I would.

I hear you about the lack of connection. I often feel the same way, even here when I know a number of you. You do deserve to be here as much as anyone else. I think the lack of connection stems from our unstable sense of ourselves.

I think all that we can really do is put one foot in front of the other, slowly if needs be. Connect even if it doesn't feel like you are. We are all doing the best we can at any given time.

Hugs for my angel.

Are you safe atm?

[Former-Member]

@outlander 

Good night @outlander @Sans911 

Sherry 💕