My Mosaic

[Snowie]

I know the feeling hon @Bow 

It makes me feel guilty.

Even now just doing ECT once per month still makes me feel guilty for H.

[tyme]

So you can't have it as an outpatient at all @Bow ? @Snowie , don't you have it as an outpatient? Or is that only the manitenance ones?

Whatever it is, I hope you find something helpful @Bow . It sounds so tough.

[Bow]

They have tried to sort it out as an outpatient but it never gets anywhere @tyme  you can have it as an outpatient for maintenance cause it’s just the one treatment monthly or whatever it is. 
having it 3 times a week, Monday Wednesday and Friday is more difficult. Even when I had it done 15 yrs ago I was inpatient but went home later that afternoon and came back the night before. They wouldn’t even let me do that now. 

[Snowie]

@tyme I really think it depends on a lot of things.

Where you live in relation to the facility.

How often you have it.

What their policy is.

What pdoc you have and probably many more things.

When I did it 3 times per week I only ever did it as an inpatient. I live a good hour away so going in there 3 times a week to have it as an outpatient wasn't going to work. It's not just me that I had to think about. It's H having to drive me in, wait around and then pick me up about 4 hours later. Also my pdoc wanted me to do it as an inpatient. I guess too, when I did have it, I was in a bad place, so being admitted was probably for the best.

I am currently doing it once per month. They call it maintenance. Both my pdoc and me hope by doing this it keeps me out of hospital. I can't afford to go in, especially with looking after mum. Also the amount of pressure it puts on H and also my D.

[Snowie]

Hi @Bow 🫂🫂

Just leaving some 💗💗 for you hon and seeing how you went today with the pdoc and SW.

Here with you 

[Bow]

Hi @Snowie  thanks 

pdoc appointment went…… ok. His increased one of my meds. His still concerned. Mentioned hospital again. That made me clam up and I didn’t tell him everything. 
SW was there too. As was CM. 

how was your day?

[Snowie]

oh @Bow 

Your pdoc mentioning hospital must have been hard. I know how hard it is to go in. So many people relying on us outside. Hopefully the med increase helps.

Thats good that your CM and SW were there. Did that make it a little easier at all?

My day was ok. Just dealing with mum and the last of the paperwork.

[Bow]

Yep it was hard hearing that @Snowie  but I’m kinda glad that they are finally seeing how much I am struggling- that’s also what my SW said to me afterwards too. 

gonna keep having pretty regular appointments too. Bit more frequent than usual.

I always appreciate my SW being there- if I can’t talk and mention some things, she can advocate for me. 

when does your mum go in again?

[Snowie]

I really hope that the more frequent appointments help @Bow 

I'm also glad your SW understands too. Just hoping that they are around when you need them.

I know that support for you has been a little low lately.

Mum officially moves in tomorrow. So we will take some of her things and just keep moving things in the next few days. Hoping in a few weeks we can have the room set up exactly how she wants it.

[Bow]

Hopefully @Snowie  and will see what my psychologist has to say Thursday about my therapy moving forward when she goes on leave. 

Hope tomorrow goes well for your mum. I’m sure she is a little anxious too?