Hurt

[Cadstar]

Hi there,

first time poster.

really struggling after coming out of a 13 year relationship.

thought a trip to cairns would be just what I needed.

cried when I was sitting next to my adult son on the plane.

so used to it being my Ex

cried when I went to the reef and the ex was not there.

cannot stop thinking about her.

knowing there is no chance of getting back.

she has lost all feelings for me.

i on the other hand still love her to bits.

[Ru-bee]

Welcome to the forums @Cadstar . I'm so glad that you've found this community and have been able to share some of what you're going through.

Heartbreak is awful and I'm so sorry to hear you're going through that right now. It can feel quite similar to grief, as we do tend to grieve that person in our life and the future we may have envisioned together, especially after being together for 13 years.

How can we best support you through this? 

[MermaidHair]

Hello @Cadstar, welcome to the forums,

I'm sorry to hear what brings you here, I can really feel the hurt and heartbreak in your post. 

13 years is a very long time to love someone..

There are no rules or timeline on mourning a relationship, what you're feeling is more than valid so try no be hard on yourself at this difficult time.

Please post here again if you need someone to listen or feel like talking 💜

[Tilz]

hi @Cadstar Thanks for sharing. Seems like its really hard to bear up. What if you talk with her and tell how you love her. 

[Hope2Recovery]

Hi @Cadstar, Welcome to the forum, nice to have you here. You are in a safe place where experienced members listen and care.

I'm sorry to hear that you are going through this, I can understand and relate to what you are going through,13 years is a long time and a lot to deal with. I also went through a similar break-up of 20 years, it wasn't easy, I relied on my partner for everything. It felt like I almost had to learn how to talk and walk again. I soon realised I had to get on with my life, I was being so hard on myself, that I started to get sick. it took a long time but I got there! without turning to drugs or alcohol, instead, I started exercising, working on my health, slowing down, kept my mind and body occupied by doing fun things. I expressed my feelings and talked to family and friends. Also talking to a therapist helped me a lot. 

Be kind to yourself, things will work out for the better, just give it some time. It would be nice to find out how you keeping up, I wish you nothing but good health, success and happiness, take care.