My special place

[Snowie]

Had DBT today. Up to 5th session out of 8 so the weeks are going quickly.

Today we looked at the DBT diary that we will have to keep each week when I start the 12 month program. Looked very detailed and a way to track all sorts of emotions. Was a bit overwhelming. Spoke to the facilitator one on one today and my struggle to participate in discussions. She said I was going fine and not to be too hard on myself. That made me feel a little better but still find the whole sitting in a circle discussing topics in the very much "too hard basket".

Am tired this afternoon from the drive there, the day and the drive home. Have taken a prn so hopefully that will settle me a bit. I hope you are all going okish in your day.

@outlander@Faith-and-Hope@Sans911@Zoe7and anyone else I have forgotten 

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am so glad you asked @Snowie, and received some positive feedback .....

Just take the baby steps Hon, rather than looking up at the size of the whole mountain ..... just baby steps along the path and keep your gaze local to what is around you in the moment.

💜💐

[Zoe7]

Don't be so hard on yourself @Snowie - you might recall I felt exactly the same way when I started DBT and it took me more than 10 weeks to talk at all - I still say very little and have had the issue of being taked over several times - but the oerson that did that is now leaving the group so I feel a little more confident that I will be heard now.

My pdoc was just happy that I was attending the group - I talked to her a fair bit about how I was struggling with it and why - but I stuck it out and that she is the most happy with!

The diary card gets a litttle tricky to remember to fill in sometimes - I have a night time routine - take meds then fill in diary card - sometimes what I fill in at night gets changed the next day when I haven had a bad night (I always use pencil for exactly that situation lol)

[Snowie]

Thanks @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope

@Zoe7we are practising the Diary Card this week so the pencil thing is a good idea. Mine would change too depending on the night I have had. I might make a set time every night to fill it out this week.

[Zoe7]

The front is easier for me to do @Snowie - there are some sections (i.e. self-harm) that don't apply for me so I simply cross them out. The back with the skills gets easier with practice but it does take a lot of practice and the more skills you look at throughout the modules the more sections you can fill in. I always miss heaps - there are some that I do everyday but others I forget I have done also ...my pdoc and I usually go through them and she always gets me to tick more than I had done. I think we sometimes think we haven't done much but when we really break it down we have done more than we think.

[Snowie]

We only have to do the front @Zoe7 and a little of the back. Because we have not yet learnt the skills, we only have to do the front and then the mindfulness part on the back. I cannot imagine doing this each week but I guess it does get easier with time and with the more skills you learn along the way. 

[Zoe7]

I think my pdoc forgets sometimes that I have only done 2 modules so far lol @Snowie

I don't generally write much on the front - only if something significant has happened or if I have had a bad day/night. My pdoc concentrates on the ratings and then the skills on the back - she will talk with me about the ratings and why they were as they were. We also go through the diary cards at the end of each module to see if theremare any patterns or things we can see that po up regularly. I know Sundays are still often my worst nights!

[Snowie]

@Zoe7i guess they are good for seeing any patterns and if some nights are worse/better than others. Perhaps patterns you would not have seen otherwise. We were told that when we do the program and have the individual sessions, the diray cards will be discussed in these sessions as well as other things. Makes sense I guess. 

[Zoe7]

Yeah that is how we do it too @Snowie - it does help to see where we have had the worst days and what has been happening for us leading up to those days. It makes it easier than trying to remember when things started to get bad for us and why as so often it is not one thing (or anything we can pinpoint) later in the week.

[Snowie]

@Zoe7well I will see how I go for the week and report back to you!! The diary must be something all ppl have to do when they do the DBT course.